Wednesday, February 25, 2015

oh happy milestones

You have kids and you instantly bond with them and think they're adorable and become insufferable on all social media platforms with your endless albums of all of the milestones.


Yes, I'm up their with the guiltiest! Because...hello this entire blog and 75% of my favorite topics of convo.

As a parent you hang onto their every everything...smiles, likes, dislikes, and quirks (those are always endearing). You start to caption their photos with things like, "heart melting" and "my heart" and "be still my beating heart" and you think that the emoji with heart eyes was made just for your wee darlings.

Sometimes the sleepless nights, the worry, the never ever ever ending feeling of being perpetually overwhelmed, and all the crying that sounds suspiciously like someone is faking their own death, makes me wonder how I can love them so much while simultaneously needing a very long break from their antics...every 5-8 minutes.

But thank goodness for progress and milestones! Those milestones that make having the crazies underfoot (and overhead) every day.

Just let me stray into the land of optimism and promise for a few minutes...

Time for potty training prattle!! With Rad I never even thought that maybe in a million years I would play the a game of bodily fluid Clue with a person that speaks 1/9000000000th of the English language, but I would honestly give Rad a 7 out of 10 so far on the training front. !!! You're surprised? Consider me floored. I wasn't even going to think about potty training him until he was using complete sentences, but it turns all-star is stellar at yelling "POTTY!" and "POO!" (his universal term for all bodily functions) and making a beeline for the bathroom. Plus he's not rebelling and peeing on Rhett's face or anything crazy. I still throw down a towel on on any soft surface like the couch, because stale urine isn't a smell I want to associate my life with all the time, but really we are rocking the being at home part of potty training. (We have not ventured far out of the house in underpants because I am thee consummate novice mother...)

Learning tricks of the trade. 
Genetics isn't my best subject (neither is spelling without auto correct though...) all I know is that Rhett's bike riding genes are far superior to Jake and mine. I learned to ride without training wheels when I was 6 and it took at least a week. Jake shares a similar uninspiring story. But clearly the bike riding gene fell far from the tree with Rhett because in about 12 minutes he was off and pedaling sans training wheels.



You hear that clucking in the background? That would be the approval of one proud mother hen.

I still occasionally get the panicky and overwhelmed feeling and the other day I was in a funk. A bad one. For no good reason! Well the 5AM panic attack might have made me tired and when I'm tired I'm the queen of the funk. Really I think I was just fighting off the bizarre feeling of isolation and loneliness that can come with staying at home (for me!) and experiencing the weight of anticipation at bringing baby boy #3 home in a few weeks. The boys were their usual level of handful but nothing out of the ordinary and while I sat there leaning on the wall in our room while the boys jumped on the bed I closed my eyes. Six seconds later Rad came over and pulled my hair (Rad + hair pulling = true love) and Rhett asked if I was tired. Admitting I was, he started pulling every pillow and blanket off the bed. I was this close to getting upset at the extra mess but Rhett told me to come lay down on my "nest" (bed). He was so adamant that it was my nap time that I laid down on my "nest." Rhett turned into mother hen, tucking me in, getting me a stuffed zebra, and sternly told me that it was time to sleep. When my 4 year old says jump, I jump and when he said sleep I zonked. For a heavenly 15 minutes.

I woke up to having Rhett and Rad laying on the nest and Rhett softly talking to Rad telling him to be quite. Although we move at an imperfect pace most days it was really nice to finally feel like the world might not come crashing down around me (Dramatics-R-Me) and I may have shed a tear of motherly love for the boys. (Emotional Displays-R-Me too)

A week ago we faced the musical bedrooms and did what we've needed to do to get ready for the baby to take over Rad's room...threw Rad in with Rhett into the new bunk beds.

99 threats from both parents and two hours later... they were asleep. Jake and I like to sit in the hallway and listen to their conversations after we turn the lights off. Rad lays on the bottom bunk and call out "Wett?" "Wett??" 71 times in 10 seconds to which Rhett responds "Rad I am trying to SLEEP. You need to be SO quite!" After Rad pushes enough of Rhett's buttons, Rhett comes stomping out very indigent and righteously huffy. Rad always follows thinking there's a party he might miss. Sadly there is never a party.

Anyway I asked them after there first night...what was it like sharing a room for the first time?

Rhett: It felt like a dream!
Rhett: Until Rad cried.

Rad: No bed!!!

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Monday, February 23, 2015

I like the way your shirk...

your duties mom.

I don't want to complain, but I'll merely state the fact that I am really tired. I knew this kind of jarring pregnancy fatigue was coming and I really enjoyed the surge of pregnancy energy (voracious hunger and all) in anticipation of the impending exhaustion so I don't know why I'm so surprised.

I really wish I had the fortitude of a saint. Instead, I've been moving one step forward and two steps back in the housework, personal appearance, and patience realms. OK and blogging. How to kill a blog 101? Be 30 weeks pregnant.


Housework: I'm in a constant war with Rad's breakfast, snack, lunch, snack, dinner, snack, dessert, snack leftovers strewn about the house. I am always armed with a broom and baby wipes.

Personal appearance:  While I was filling out paperwork at a recent appointment, I was asked if I worked outside the home with a tone that makes me fairly certain the kind woman had already clicked, "No!!!!' using my outfit (stretchy pants, oversized T-shirt and one faux diamond in left ear) and mom expression (perma-raised eyebrows indicating heightened hearing for signs of boys running away) as telling indicators.

Patience:  The boys are put in their timeout spots more frequently every day for bopping each other over the head and not sharing.

This last one- sharing. Mother of all bleeping frustrations. It seems that the offspring will never carpe the concept of taking turns. Whatever Rhett has, Rad wants. Whatever I have, they both must indulge in.

For example, a snippet from earlier in the week...

Julia: Rhett, you need to learn to share with Rad.
Rhett: Okay.
Julia exits the room
Rhett: Rad, you need to learn to share with ME.

And a could be snippet if Rad's vernacular ever expands....

Julia: Rad, you have to share with Rhett.
Rad: But I just want to share with me.

My current state of exhaustion seems to limit my make-good-moral-choices lectures and lessons to 3 a day, so once I've maxed those out I am very likely to do just about anything to keep the peace. Like buy 2 of the same item just so they each have one...

(...before you roll your eyes at my pathetic desperation please know that some of those materialistic bribes were worth every penny for the peace that they restored. I might just cry tears of sheer happiness after I do a jig in the street when we get that peace.)

Rad's favorite rousing cheer is something that sounds like "Let's get ready to gruuuuumble!"

Me! Me!
Mine! Mine!
No! No! No!

Example? Sure.

This is the post apocalyptical variety of not sharing victory dance. Al la Rad.

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Wednesday, February 11, 2015

adventurers gonna adventure

Thank you, thank you, and caps lock THANK YOU for all the sage wisdom with the baby name post! Both here and on FB you all helped narrow down some ideas and feel better about some of our candidates.  :) 

The boys spent about 10 days completely hacking up their little lungs and anything else in their bodies. Rad had bronchitis and Rhett had pneumonia for the 4th year in a row. Some anniversaries just shouldn't happen. But I really shouldn't complain. As soon as the boys even start breathing funny, so long as around of nebulizers, steroids and antibiotics does the trick I just start saying prayers of thanks that it isn't the stomach flu because toddlers + projectile throw up/dehydration = just the worst. I'll take coughing over the vomit plague any day, in case the illness gods are reading. :)

Rhett's a seasoned pro with all this now, but he still tells me in 86 different and creative ways how much he hates being sick:

My wungs are so annoying!

I just can't handle this any wonger!

My wife is so frustrating, Mom!

Maybe a milkshake will help?

Can you find some better medicine?

Where's my blanket?

Where's my tissue?

Where's my water?

And I'll share the fact that I hired Diego, Dora, and amigos to babysit my young from around 3:00 in the pm till 5:30PM during the Great Cough Epidemic of 2015. Let me guess ... you'd like the opportunity to stare in awe at my mother skill set? Be my honored guest.

But now with good health gracing our abode we are in full circus mode.  Errrrrrrrday.

Or rave mode. Especially after 7:38PM.

The perfect weather fairies finally descended upon our arid land where it is now not too hot, not too cold, but just right. We've discovered two new parks including this one with the "go-go-go!" slide. Rad yells this in an equal parts terrified and thrilled voice as he barrels down. When he gets to the bottom he throws his hands up and yells "Wheee!" with a post victory jump session.

Rad loves the swing...moving or still. In this area he's always been my favorite.

When Rhett is pushed on the swing he reports to be "feeling so much energy" with each push. I can assure you that this can be attributed to something he's seen on Netflix.

These two and their hate/love/hate relationship. Twill baffle me forever. They've just started sharing a room as we commence a new round of sleep training before boy #3 enters the world. This grainy gem was snapped when they both wandered into our room and hour and half after we had tucked them in. Rhett had to go to the bathroom, but let us know he was also up for snuggling and making birthday cards if we wanted him to. Tempting. Rad just does whatever Rhett does so he also wanted to make birthday cards. 

Their contributions to the Hallmark dynasty. 

I've started walking in the evening, not far, and sometimes I bequeath the privilege to join on the crew. It goes something like this with them..."walk, run. walk, throw rocks, run, poke a stick in a hole, run, see a dog, freak out, pet the dog, walk, run, throw rocks, beg to get a dog."

Rad REALLY/clearly likes the throwing rocks part. 

Ones undergarments should always match ones scooter. Rad philosophy #47.

And Rad's hiding place of choice on 2.5.15. Ostrich style behind the assortment. 

Miles of smiles,

the adventuring team

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Monday, February 2, 2015

baby names

Also known as...tiny human names.

And possibly one of the best parts of creating offspring. (!!!)

I was going to hold this post off another three weeks or so till I was 30 weeks along, but I'm having a super girly moment today so let's discuss.

Really, I don't have anything new or exciting to say about baby names, but I'm really hoping to hear any suggestions you have for our brood AND how you all pick names because that is more exciting then anything I could say. Guaranteed. Whenever Jake wants to cheer me up he offers to chat about baby names because I love chatting about baby names so I'm sorry - this might be long.

I love to obsess over names (especially girl, but so far we have no girls so...) while Jake loves to not obsess and rapidfireshootdown my always "brilliant" suggestions.

Coming up with boy names is HARD (for us). Even though we've played the name game twice already, the third time is stressing me out more than than first two times. I remember looking at all of the papers in the hospital after Rhett was born and seeing his name written on everything, and realizing what a permanent, life long, no-going-back thing it was (unless he decided to change it, but let's be honest, I think that's what we're trying to avoid at least a little bit).

Of course there is the legendary Swistle and I'm sure there are a million amazing name posts swirling around the blogosphere with sage baby naming wisdom. I also like looking at the forums on Nameberry and whenever I find a potential candidate I send it on to Jake. He loves the 4PM texts with the newest bizarro name suggestions. Just loves them.

We love the names we chose for our kids, but certainly don't think they are superior to any other baby names. I guess our name-choice-philosophy is that we try to strike a balance between not-totally-off-the-wall (Yes we have a Rad. Irony be darned!) but not super popular and still sort of traditional tough. We lean almost exclusively towards one syllable names for boys.

We are torn on doing another R name or not doing an R name. ANY thoughts, opinions, dreams/visions, wisdom you want to share on whether we should or should not do an R name pleasepleaseplease share!

So with all that ramble in mind here's out current list of possibilities. Bolded are our top choices with nicknames in parentheses. We will be doing an A middle name to go with the boy's A middle names.

R names:

Reddington (Redd)

Not R names:

Beckett (Beck or Becks)
Henry (Huck)

Even with this list, we're not even kind of settled on any name and I think last night's quote courtesy of Jake went a little something like, "you realize the baby will have to live with this name his ENTIRE life, right?" after my 6th rejected suggestion.

But let's face it. In the end, we are inevitably going to screw up our children in some way, so it's most fitting to start with their name and just get it out of the way, right?


So please suggest and spill your guts on boy names!

Or pray for peace and inspiration in our home.  ;) Pin It

Thursday, January 29, 2015

the smorgasbord

Grandeur and depth central today!

I've been sitting down to blog everyday last week but have been having a hard time putting half a cohesive strand together. Rutty rut rut over here.

I've been hoping to glean some inspiration from my usual sources but they have been pretty boring lately:

+ Rad hasn't learned any new tricks to report...we're working very hard on his handstands but he just can't quite get it...yet. Remedial little boy.

+ He has however gleaned the concept of "the loophole." Gladiator takes lots of swings and punches...usually they are just aimed at the air that's all up in his personal space, but occasionally they make contact. So after the multiple times of responsible parental course correction and instruction Rad has found his favorite loophole. The head butt. He gives the side eye and then bam. Noggin extraordinaire makes contact.

+ And lastly, nothing currently makes him angrier than a parent trying to dispose of one of his pungent diapers in the big trash can on the side yard and not taking him with for the adventure. He loves throwing anything away in the garbage can and always walks away clapping his hands when he disposes of non garbage worthy items.

+ I have this anxious pit in my rapidly expanding belly that Rhett is jumping ahead a few years and entering the gross-9-year-old-potty-humor phase.  An hour of his life is not complete until he makes someone smell his feet and give him the exaggerated, "ewwwww" - even though exaggeration is never necessary because his feet smell truly terrible. Jake says they are going to ruin all of his chances with any ladyloves in the future and I think Jake is right.

+ Rhett's also entering a hippy-new-age-guru-naturalist phase (should have seen it coming with his love of being outdoors in the nude...) were he insists on only drinking LEAF water. Leaf water. You don't know what leaf water is? Well here's the recipe. Leaf water is filling Aunt Jane's left behind Smart Water bottle, letting it chill in the fridge to a crisp sip and then pour it into a sippy cup. But! Lest it sound too deliciously refreshing, be warned...apparently leaf water is poison to anyone but Rhett. Which means my days of secretly chugging water out of a sippy cup when I forget my H2O bottle are over.

+ Jake. His life has been taken over by two things. Assembling recent IKEA purchases for the baby and boy's rooms and working out hard core in his truly awesome attempt at getting back in shape. (He's doing so good!) His thoughts on both endeavors?


"All I do is assemble. I'm a freaking avenger."


"I don't dance at the gym. (after he filled me in on his updated playlist) I do my pah duh boo-rays. (Pas de bourrées)

+ And me? Let's just say that at Chick-fil-a a week or so ago I was about to eat a waffle fry when I dropped it. Unable to find it (to clean up! not eat off the ground)  I moved on. About 2 minutes later I leaned back to stretch and found the missing fry on the shelf that is now my belly. Response? "Oh there you are!" and I ate it. (Cringing emoji)

All hail Queen J, the classiest prego on the block.

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Wednesday, January 21, 2015

30 for 30

Being SUPER original here... like always.

Or self indulgent.
Or narcissistic.
Vapid? Likely.

Or maybe all of the above. But I thought I'd post a little "30 things about Julia!" on my 30th birthday at the beginning of the month, but that did not happen. So, I'm just a little tardy to the party with the list.

Your excitement is palpable, I can feel it.

These have probably all been revealed in one post or another or another at some point over the last few years, but I've never been known for my originality.

So, here you go.

And! Just in case you were wanting to feel better about your pre-pubescent years, in honor of my recent 30th birthday I present to you...clueless Julia at age 12.

The struggle was real.

Like very very real.

Oh how far you've come Julia.

Also, I can totally hear Steve Urkel saying, "those glasses are too big!!" and I just might agree.

Okay, let's go.

1. Ever since I read her book and started following her on Instagram, I've had regularly recurring dreams that I'm best friends forever with Mindy Kaling. She should be sufficiently creeped.
2. Celebrity crush...absolutely Jimmy Fallon.
3. When I was in middle school I was convinced I would be more popular if my wrists weren't so bony.
4. Watching YouTube videos of baby orangutans before bed is becoming a weird obsession.
5. Like...I am becoming absolutely desperate to hold one.
6. Some videos might make me teary. Like this one.
8. I get really scared when opening umbrellas. When they have the button that makes them pop open...anxiety to the max.
9. I hate milk and all forms of melted cheese.
10. My favorite book is Gone with the Wind. I've read it every year since 8th grade.
11. My favorite candy is (currently) Butterfingers
12. My favorite dessert is...really truly I don't love most desserts. Candy yes, but traditional desserts no.
13. My favorite meal is fajitas with a sinful amount of guacamole.
14. I'm almost always cold. Even in an AZ summer I will almost always be wearing jeans. Or a long sleeve shirt with shorts.
15. If I could change my name I would chose Kate.
16. Biggest social fear...random strangers not liking me. Including the driver behind me, the woman on aisle 5, and the mailman who I've met once for 2 seconds.
17. My high school choir teacher asked me once, dead serious, "Has anyone ever told you you're probably tone deaf?"
18. My biggest talent is getting a to-do list done. Watch out America's Got Talent. Coming atch-ya with my post-its.
19. My full name is Julia Barbara Holbein Miller. The SS office messed up when we got married and didn't drop Barbara. So now I sound like a pompous donkey.
20. I've never drank a drop of coffee but almost every job I had in high school was in a coffee shop.
21. The most random employment I've ever had is as a sports official for my college's intramural program. I was accidentally tackled during a men's flag football game.
22. Going with the college theme, I had 6 declared majors, broadcasting, horticulture/landscape design, social studies education, history and finally marriage and family therapy.
23. I love clogging.
24. And horse back ridding.
25. My dream job would be as a plastic surgeon.
26. I really really want a big ol' motorcycle.
27. I'm deathly afraid of haunted houses, mazes, movies, etc. I tried to watch "The Ring" once and spent the entire movie singing church hymns under a blanket. I would only come out when the sun was shining in the movie.
28. In terms of fight or flight I definitely choose hide. See the example above if you need proof.
29. In fact, I'm 99% positive there is literally no amount of money you could pay me to go through a haunted house. A billion dollars? Not even close to enough.
30. I have a semi-secret dream to be the Bachelorette. If I wasn't married and horribly giggly around attractive males.  

Toe touch to being 30. :)

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Friday, January 16, 2015

Rad refuses

To believe that this is actually his dear father. He stubbornly insists that he is either:

a) Mom or
b) Mommy or
c) Momma or
d) Mommommomom! or
e) MOMMY!! or
f)  Ma.

Jake has decided to be an adult, stop fighting the toddler, and just shoot a smile in the direction of his confusion instead.

Rad geniually seems to have no answer to the question "who's your daddy?"

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