Friday, February 5, 2016


A quick peek at the running list on my phone of things to document on the blog showed me that a few things have fallen between the cracks. Which is totally not acceptable!!

First of all...

these babies reached 7 years of marriage at the end of December. They were so cute.

Oh wait, they are still cute. Wink. ;)

Anniversaries get recognized the way subsequent children do after the first. Each is precious, but sadly not as well documented as the first.

But it's not all doom and gloom on the anniversary front. We've had a great 7 years. We had three little boys in 4 1/2 years....sometimes I think we are/were certifiably loco. We have been poor...we have been "rich" (which, was still actually poor) we have had negative account balances, we have eaten lots of versions of ramen. Lots. We haven't done a lot of fancy stuff, but we really have a great time doing the little stuff together. That's one of the reasons I wanted to marry Jake, it's always a good time. It occurred to me recently that And it's probably somewhere on the loco train that we really would spend every day all day together. In the words of phoebe buffay, he is my lobster.

Happy anniversary Jakester. After all this time you are still magic to me. And I will still eat a lot of ramen with you. Happily. ;)

Anyway, aren't you glad I shared that love fest? Surely! You must be!

What else?

I entered my 31st year. I didn't have any nostalgia ridden adieu to leaving 30 because really...who cares. OK I care a little. Mostly I find it weird that I'm not 24 because I feel like that was literally 6 weeks ago max.

It wasn't my favorite birthday ever, because I am a high maintenance birthday gal. It's so buts, it's fully ridiculous. But true. I don't know what a birthday should look like when you're 31 with three kids but maybe by next year I'll figure it out. ;)

In the morning Rhett and I went for a hike and in the evening Jake and I went to look at model home (hey now...don't mock it till you try it!) and went to dinner.

My one and only birthday gift (God bless Jake...he tries really hard with my birthday but since it falls right after Christmas and our anniversary I know picking out yet another gift isn't easy) was from Tyrell and she NAILED it. Not much makes me happier than power tools and a LEAF BLOWER no less!! I've wanted one for so long. She would know...I borrow(ed) her's all the time.

And the biggest and best news award goes to this tiny guy,

who officially made me an aunt! 

Everyone say hi to Nathan, he's still relatively new around here. 

I don't know if I'm more thrilled that my sister had a boy, for cousin bonding purposes of course, or that watching my sister become a mom has been one of my favorite things I've shared with her.  

And for all the sake of all that is cute and even more ridiculously cute I'll leave you with this.

I mean we're looking at the beginning of the bros or something otherwise historic.

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Monday, January 25, 2016

Rhett and Rad chat

^^^ Ben's micro expressions indicate he is unsure about his feelings regarding his new brothers.

On the phone with a grandparent:

Rhett: Yeah, I'm in kindergarten. It's pretty cool, I guess.
Rhett: Kind of intense.

The unfiltered honesty of a child:

Rhett: Your breath stinks.
Julia: Looks at phone...
Julia: It's 3:38AM
Rhett: Let's snuggle.

At the post office:

Rhett: What's wrong mom?
Julia: I don't feel great today.
Post guy: Can I help you Ma'am?
Julia: No that will be all.

A Sunday afternoon:

Rhett: Hey Dad.
Rhett: I'm just chillin'
Rhett: But that doesn't mean I'm cold.

A few days before my birthday:

Rhett: How old will you be on your birthday?
Julia: I'm 30 now, what comes after that?
Rhett: 50
Julia: Yeah, that's pretty much it.

Whispered at church:

Rhett: Mom
Julia: Yes?
Rhett: Your eyelashes look really good today.

During a Family Home Evening lesson taught by Rhett:

Rhett: This is Thomas S. Monson. (our church's prophet)
Rhett: I'm a really big fan of him.

And a little from Mr. Rad

A sunny afternoon: 

Rad: (terrified) MOMMA!!
Julia: ...the next president of the free world folks.

At a rare real family dinner: 

Rad: (takes plate to sink)
Julia: Rad aren't you hungry? You barely ate.
Rad: Yeah, I not hunry.
Rad: (comes over to my chair) What you eating momma?
Julia: The same thing you had.
Rad: Can I have a bite?

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Wednesday, January 20, 2016


We're still not Snapchatting around here...but that doesn't mean that we've stopped taking lots of little videos like the subpar videographers we are. Which means the videos will eventually come out of the archive folders and see the light of the web. You're welcome universe.

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Monday, January 18, 2016

the place with the grapes

A story about taking your children out to eat at a restaurant on the weekend.

One fine Christmas Break day we were cruising in the mini van and out of the window Rhett saw with great excitement "the place with the grapes."

Known to most people as the Olive Garden.

Rhett claimed to have fond memories of feeling like family and their breadsticks. Rad is pretty much part Italian with his love of pasta. We haven't taken the boys to a real restaurant (or Olive Garden) in...a year? Longer? What we loved about the idea of taking the boys to Olive Garden was not the food (sorry. but the kids love there's that) but that it was a real restaurant but not the fanciest joint on the block.

Jake and I felt super optimistic about publicly breaking bread as a family but we should have known not to do it the evening we did. Take a 5 year old a 2 1/2 year old  and a 9 month old...both of the latter who hadn't napped to dinner? IN A RESTAURANT WITH OTHER PEOPLE IN IT?! But no, we did it anyway. I really wanted to have a family bonding moment, so we took the chance. It did not work out in our favor.

We kew it was bad when the boys start to get cranky before we even ordered and Jake and I sat there and wondered if we should just abandon ship right from the get go. But we felt bad, they had already brought bread sticks and water and man I REALLY wanted some bottomless salad of a sudden, so we forged ahead, blindly ignoring the pretty blatant warning signals Beck and Rad were sending out like the bat signal to get the F out of there before they changed into terrible toddler monsters. The guy waiting on our table had some special waiter sixth sense and even warned me that we should just order our unlimited soup and salad combos immediately because "it would take a while" and we did, and we were locked in. But we did ask the him to bring the boy's food AS SOON AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE because maybe that would buy us some time.

And within the first 15 minutes...

- Beck turbo-ed himself into a salad bowl sending lettuce to places lettuce shouldn't be which scared his little soul to death.

- Rhett loudly declared that Rad's spaghetti was "the grossest thing EVER."

- Rad showed off his stellar eating manners.

^^^ I love how our 2 year old can figure out how to work the TV remote, but can't find his mouth while eating spaghetti.

- They continued to spill and drop stuff. A lot.

- Beck continued to realize the world is a scary place and was only happy chewing on my hair.

- Rhett got distracted by organizing the sugars and was deeply effected when Rad commandeered all the breadsticks...the soul reason Rhett had wanted to go the place with the grapes.

- Rhett punched Rad to "teach him a lesson" about stealing a man's breadsticks.

- A new waitress stopped by to ask if we "needed anything" and her long hair wooed Rhett into offering this pick up line "Hey girl, I can write my whole name...with lowercase letters. Does that impress you?"

And before that relationship could steamify we did a hasty clean up, left a generous tip, offered the practiced "Apologetic Parent Face"   ( You know the one. The one that is sort of like a facial shrug, like "I'm really sorry, I know my child is being loud but I am a good parent and I will try to remedy this ASAP.") and herded everyone out to the car. 

Oh...but first me made Rad turn in the "your table is ready" beepers which he almost kelpto-ed which lead to a high-knee-run-in-place-and-then-collapse-tantrum in front of the hostess desk.

Rhett hoped his waitress love interest wasn't watching the shenanigans. 

Bonus: Rhett shared that the breadsticks weren't his favorite after all on the drive home. 

L to the O to the ironic L. 

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Friday, January 8, 2016

introducing Ben the puppy

Because three little boys just wasn't enough fun.

Exclamation points !!!!!

That little ball of white fluff is the newest little boy to our crew. Ben is a bichon frise, is 12 weeks new and joined our family on Christmas morning.

Their boundless excitement lasted for 72 boy hours, 100 dog hours and 238 mom hours. Ha.

I feel like I should say "SURPRISE!" because getting a puppy certainly doesn't seem like a rational short of decision when you have three little boys. And it's not. Totally not rational. But just look at that face!! HE'S SO FLUFFY WE COULD DIE! (Name that movie)

All fluffy puppy love emotions aside, Jake and I have been thinking about getting a dog since we first got married. Fact: the amount of research we did before getting Ben was 1000X more research than we did before we started having kids. Our logic....we're thinking that we'll get all the potty training, put random stuff in your mouth, eat of the ground, phases done at the same time. In reality on Christmas morning we (I) thought we lost our minds.

But really, Ben's has been such a blessing for our family. His breed is the best for our us and the boys. He's crazy energetic when the turkeys play with him and he's just as happy to chill and follow me around. #perfectchild

A few highlights from the past two weeks:

When I overheard Rhett asking Ben "who's your daddy?"

Rad taking EXTREME interest in Ben's potty training. He sits in the middle of the backyard monitoring Ben's movements and then gives a fully detailed report. He also loves putting on the plastic gloves and picking up the fun stuff. That's a plus. The downside is that Rad now want's to mimic Ben's potty routine. I'll let that one just sink in...

Our thought process with getting a puppy included the notion that if we had a puppy our boys might stop playing puppy (including barking when the door bell rang) all the time. Not the case.

Rhett taking Ben's exercise very seriously.

Beck gets the uncontrollable giggles when Ben wrestles with his toys. Beck gets the uncontrollable giggles when Ben sniffs him or kisses him. Beck does not get the uncontrollable giggles when Ben tries to use Beck as a pillow or when Ben plows him over when Ben's loving life.

Rad thinks Ben's water dish is a pool for his Power Rangers. Or his own personal watering hole. Thrice. Hopefully that's over.

Ben...welcome to the tribe/herd/crew/family. :)

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Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Fleas on a dog

^^^^post title courtesy of Rhett's translation of  of the Christmas classic Feliz Navidad.

I know he's my kid, but man...he cracks me up sometimes.

Twas 2 days before Christmas...and who hasn't done any Christmas shopping yet? Me neither, but I still believe in Santa so I'm counting on him to take care of everything.

Just kidding!! There's a few last minute details to complete. Nothing like a trip(s)(s) to Target can't solve. It's ironic when the Target cashier says "Merry Christmas" like she's not going to see me 50 more times between now and then.

Anyway, thanks to Amazon Prime and a little (OK big) surprise up our elf sleeves we are almost ready. Just have to wrap. I feel like my Christmas IQ spiked a little this year because instead of recycling our Amazon boxes as they come I'm saving them to make wrapping a little easier. Kid's toys are the WORST to wrap with all the lumps and corners.

We've hit the part of the holidays where the amount of gifts we've threatened to take away is more than the amount actually under the tree. (Insert the holiday joke of whomever wrote Silent Night obviously didn't have children...har har har) Jake and I made a vague, pre kid having, illusionary promise that we wouldn't use this threat with our at the time future kids with calling Santa, but we have, we did, we will.

A few pictures of holiday festivities. In all their grainy glory.

Our library had Mrs. Claus come. She was both hilarious and charming. She called the boys and their friend Everett up to help with a magic trick. When I had to clarify Rad's name to the group she quipped "Oh. You're one of those Moms."

Touche Mrs. Claus. Touche.

A little selfie before our Secret Santa run. Rhett....was perturbed....every group of elves has a party pooper.

In a classy Christmas move I found a fake tree on the curb for free and put it in the boys room. It was cleaned with vacuums and baby wipes. Christmas magic is especially real for Rad this year and I love it.

Ominous Christmas cookies a la Rad.

We put the boys letters to Santa in the tree and the elves come and collect them at night. Oddly, it's one of my favorite traditions. Rhett's letter was very "Rhett." He dictated:

Dear Santa,

I would like a Batman castle and Ninja turtle house. I try to be good so I want a pretend pet tortoise but please make sure it is fake. Thank you.

Love, Rhett

Rad was not inclined to be in this picture.

Since we failed with a family Christmas card this year let's count this hasty post as one. More Christmas cheer to spread and enjoy.

One last thought for posterity and Christmases future.

Rhett: Ok you be the baby Jesus and I'm the Little Drummer let's BATTLE.
Rad: CHARGE!!!

My kids. Deeply feeling the true meaning of the season.

Merry Christmas one and all!

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Friday, December 11, 2015

Rhett and Rad chat

Puh-arking it real good at the park:

Rhett: I made new friend.
Julia: Yeah?
Rhett: He's over there.
Rhett: He thinks you're my grandma.
Rhett: Probably because you have the short hair.

Unloading the groceries from the van:

Julia: Rhett can you come help me?
Rhett: Yep. (comes over to the trunk)
Rhett: So you need some muscle little lady?
Rhett (flexes) 

Burning question from my 5 year old:

Rhett: Is Taylor Swift a real person?
Rhett: Or does she just live in the radio?

A fine Saturday evening at home:

Rhett: (comes out of the playroom sans pant)
Julia: Why don't you ever wear pants?
Rhett: They slow down my karate kicks.

Doing homework (Rhett) and coloring (Rad):

Rhett: Whoa Raddie!
Rhett: Your nose just made a bubble!! (snot bubble)
Rhett: Tell your nose good job.
Rad: Dood job nose.

A Sunday afternoon: 

Rhett: Dad... Dad...DAD!!
Jake: Wha? WHAT??
Rhett: You look really tired.
Jake: That's because I was asleep.
Rhett. Oh yeah. You're funny.


Rhett: Hey Beck. (super deep sigh)
Rhett: Sometimes. Sometimes...I'm just too tired to deal with this family.
Rhett: You know what I mean?

And from Rad, our budding linguist:

Julia: Rad it's time for nap!! (best time of the day)
Rad: No.
Rad: So so sorry mom.

When learning new words meets inappropriate terms:

Rad: Wook! Shi****! (fishies)
Rad: Shi**** momma!!! Pin It