An induction date, amazing doctors, and an update.

You know what is absolutely amazing to me? How the hardest times of our lives can also be the times with the most peace. It seems to be the biggest oxymoron, but the past few weeks have been some of the most challenging for us and yet we have felt peace and unbelievable support and we have found so many reasons to have joy. 

As an update on our little baby: My doctors have had me on a super high calorie diet for the past 2 and a  half weeks (about 4000 calories a day) to try and put some weight on our little guy. At our appointment on Friday there was a little growth, but nothing really significant or what we were hoping for. His heart looks as if it will be able to withstand natural labor (at least that's the plan for now) which is a blessing and so we induced at 39 weeks, or this Sunday, March 3rd. We almost delivered him this past Friday because he was consistently failing stress tests and heart monitoring, but after spending all day at the hospital he bounced back and our doctors and specialists agreed it was OK to wait one more week so long as we come in every other day for stress tests and ultrasounds.

The hard news we got was that his femur bones are under the 5% percentile for growth and that he has multiple markers for Downs Syndrome. We chose not to have the testing done for it early on in the pregnancy and any testing now would take about 2 weeks to process and we'd be delivered by then so we are choosing to wait till he's born. We've had multiple ultrasounds done with various specialists and each come back showing the same results and markers for Downs, but without a genetic test we won't be 100% positive of the diagnoses till he's born.

I've cried a lot about this. Not because I feel like Downs would be a disadvantage for our son or that we could possibly love him less, but more because I'm afraid of how the world would treat him. Either way, we really are so excited to bring another little boy home. Because of all the ultrasounds and appointments we've had about this little guy, I feel so close to him already. Being able to see his little face on the screen so many times has been a huge blessing because I feel like I've connected with him . That I know him. I didn't feel that with Rhett before he was born.

We are SO grateful for the prayers and good thoughts that you have sent our way. We really truly have felt strengthened. Thank you for being so amazing. :)

Sometimes things don't go as planned

For the past few weeks the most common comment I get on my pregnancy is how small I still am. 

Truthfully, I didn't give it much thought. I was small with Rhett, but when I started to look at pictures of my pregnancy with him compared to where I am now, I realized I was much smaller now than I was then. Again, I didn't give much thought.

On Tuesday at my appointment, my doctor expressed concern that my belly was still measuring like I was 32 weeks (I'm 36) and suggested we do another ultra sound to see if the baby was growing. 

The ultrasound confirmed what my doctor thought, the baby hasn't grown much at all in the past month. The first concern was that something was wrong with the placenta or umbilical cord so we went to a specialist yesterday to see what was going on. The good news from the appointment was that the placenta and umbilical cord look normal, but we're still not sure why the baby has stopped growing. 

The news we didn't expect from this appointment was that the baby's leg bones are aren't fully developed, they're shorter than they should be, and that there are two apparent issues with his heart. 

We're waiting to get an appointment with a cardiologist and the next 2 weeks will determine a lot about if we'll deliver the baby early to make sure we can get him to gain weight and grow and how we'll deliver him (natural or c-section) based on the strength of his heart.

Both Jake and I are amazed at the ability we have to create life and feel that this process is nothing short of miracle and we know that sometimes things don't go as planned. We feel peaceful that though this little guy might have a rough start, but that ultimately everything will be OK.  

If you could keep us and our little guy in your thoughts and prayers we would be so extremely grateful. 

Baby's Dresser Dilemma

I swear indecisiveness is a side effect of pregnancy. 

I've gone back and forth a ridiculous amount of times with how I want this little guys room to turn out. 

But we've finally ordered and bought a few things, forcing us to make decisions.

The last "decision" is how to refinish the dresser. 

We bought this one from IKEA and we've stained it with Minwax Gel Stain in Hickory.

I bought these knobs from Anthropolgie (in lime) and we've ordered this rug from Urban Outfitters (in the redish-orange color). 

I'm not designing his room around a theme per say, but more the use of geometric patters, shapes and clean lines.

I promise it makes sense in my head. :)

 So this is where I need your help! 

I've narrowed it down to 2 ideas for his dresser. 

Option 1:

Keeping it simple and bordering the edges of the drawers with a basic white boarder.

Option 2:

Doing some kind of arrow on the drawer fronts.

My inspiration is from this wall/blanket.

So either I could do a literal arrow or something more like my inspiration pic and my sketch below. 

Thoughts?! 

What would you do, option 1 or 2 or neither?

Feel free to offer suggestions!

Life lately according to my Iphone

OK technically, Jake's Iphone.

I'm not cool enough to get my own Iphone yet. 

1

2

3

4

6

5

7

8

9

10

1. Pink peanut paradise

2. Family date night to Dairy Queen.

3. Yes, they are father and son

4. Family shadow

5. The Miller men

6. Our hardcore hiking backpack

7.  We sold our first car this weekend. The car we went on our first date in. The car we brought Rhett home in. Honestly, my heart breaks a little when I don't see it in our driveway anymore. 

8. Refinishing furniture? Please, we're building our own. (Aka: trying to.)

9. Bubbles

10. Nice bum, where ya from? ;)

A new years resolution: Turning my "Wanter" off

It's 2013!

What the crazy?!

New Years is always a great time for our family because Jake and I were married on December 30th and my birthday is January 2nd. So for us, the New Year is always a time for us to celebrate the start of our married life, and more me the start of a new year of life. 

I love the concept of a "word" as a resolution for the upcoming year. 

It's a clear, concise, simple way to improve.

I've been trying to come up with a single word that I want to use for my resolution  but all that keeps coming to my mind is a phrase. 

"Turning my wanter off."

Let me explain.

We have been SO blessed this past year. 

We bought our first house, found out we are having another baby boy, Jake's job is doing really well, we've been healthy, safe, and in general just plain happy. 

And yet, since we've been in our new home, I keep wanting more and more, and I am failing to count my blessings. 

And to be honest, I'm kind of disgusted with myself. 

The night before the Newton shooting, I was obsessing over the paint job on the baseboards. And I honestly (and sadly) lost sleep worrying about it. 

And then the next day, with the shooting, I couldn't believe that my biggest worry had been about baseboards. 

I mean really. 

So my resolution for 2013 is to turn my "wanter" off and to enjoy all the good that I already have in my life. 

via

I don't want to keep wishing for the kitchen table of my dreams.

I want to sit at our table and work on alphabet sheets with Rhett and scream our letters at the top of our lungs.

via

I want to remember that most of my "problems" are silly compared to what others go through on a daily bases, and that I need to do more to reach out. 

via

I've bought a little moleskin to act as a gratitude journal to write 3 blessings a night in. 

It's a simple thing, but I'm so excited to fill it and look back through what I've written each night. And I'm hoping it will help me focus on the blessings I have and not what I "lack".

2013, you are going to be a good year. :) 

What are your resolutions/word for the year?

Feel free to link up your posts on 2013 below!

And check out these other amazing blogs and see all of the inspiration from their holiday link parties!

Embracing Change

Bliss Ranch

Southern Lovely

Dear Emmeline

Number Fifty-Three

Alderberry Hill

It's Overflowing

The Ironstone Nest

30 week baby bump

30 week baby bump.

Love from the big brother.

When I look back at all the pictures we have documenting my pregnancy with Rhett, and then realize this is only the second one we've taken for this little boy...I feel a little guilty. 

Don't get me wrong, we are so excited for this little guy to come into our family, but we are not even close to being ready. 

Please tell me this is normal for baby number 2. 

Pregnancy is going smoothly.

This little guy was slow to get on the kicking and flipping train, but now he seems to think he is lord of dance, with long stretches of Riverdance-esq kicking. :)

I do feel a decent amount of anxiety and anticipation with the thought that the severe PPD that could happen after the birth of this one like it did with Rhett. 

I've been journaling some thoughts about it and I've debated on writing a post about coming to the decision of having another child after what we went through with Rhett, and how we're preparing for this one; but I always go back and forth on how personal information is appropriate. So we'll see. 

But anyway, we are very excited for March 10th to arrive! 

PS Rhett still doesn't seem to understand we're having a baby. He calls my belly an "ouchie" because I'm telling him constantly not to jump on it because it will give me and the baby an ouchie.    

Any suggestions on how to help prepare him as much as possible? 

Dear Santa, let me explain why I want a new toilet for Christmas

Dear Santa,

I figured by now you've received my letter asking for a new toilet for Christmas. I thought you might be a little confused by my request...considering I usually ask for new shoes and maybe a power tool or two, so I wanted to explain.

It all started the other day when our old toilet started leaking all over the bathroom floor. We wanted to be "professional homeowners" and fix it ourselves so we called some family and did a little research and figured the wax ring needed to be replaced.

We went to Lowes, got the ring, and even remembered to turn the toilet water valve off before we tried to move it. (Impressed? :))

We replaced the ring and we were so impressed with ourselves. 

Until we went to put the toilet back in place and discovered we had cracked the tank.

Sigh.

So that's why I'm asking for a new toilet for Christmas. If we replace it, it blows my budget for finishing the downstairs bathroom and laundry room and I am itching to get them finished. I promise I've been extra good this year. And I'm pregnant. Does that score me bonus point on the "nice" side of your list? Pretty please?

Love, Julia

PS Rhett has been practicing saying "Ho, ho, ho!" It's adorable. He's so excited for you to come. :)