Friday, November 11, 2016

Rhett and Rad chat

Feeling like we might have a problem:

Rhett: Who is the most handsome guy in the whole universe?
Julia: Ummmm
Rhett: Me of course mom.
Rhett: Welllll...I guess God can be the most handsomest.
Rhett: But I'm second place.

Why having kids is like living with an online troll you can't unfollow:

Rhett: Me and Rad's mustaches are becoming impressive.
Rhett: (staring at my upper lip) Your brown fur is coming in nicely too.

While holding his own blanket in his lap and sniffling:

Rad: Hey, Rhett?
Rhett: Yeah?
Rad: Can you toss me your blankie so I can blow my nose in it?

A porta-potty break at the pumpkin farm:

Rad: Mommy...are we in a trash can?
Julia: Basically.

While trying to decide what to do one afternoon:

Rad: Oh, can we watch a CVD?
Rhett: Rad! I keep telling you! It's called a DIVA-D.

After Beck preformed his newest trick...a highly noisy, enthusiastic kiss:

Julia: You're so sweet, Beck.
Rad: He's not that sweet.

During the bubonic a month-ish ago:

Rhett: Can you we go to the store today to buy some apples and chips?
Julia: No, Rad is still sick, I'm sorry.
Rhett: Well, I have a great idea
Rhett: He can just throw up in his hands.
Rhett...and then put it in his pockets and no one will see.

Seeing this image on a guys shirt:

Rhett: Why is Abraham Lincoln in such a bad mood?


Charging down the Target toy aisle:

Rad: (YELLING) MOM!!! I found my favorite pony!!!
Rad: I found HORNEY SPARKLES!!!!!!!
Indeed...the pony's unicorn horn was highly bedazzled. 

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Monday, November 7, 2016

Halloween 2K16

In years of Halloween's past, I can face the sad truth that often times I was not the most prepared holiday coordinator (remember the duck tape to secure Rad's Loki cape?) the boy's would change their costumes five times and plus, and often we were already out of candy (OK that may be me and my late night sweet tooth faults') to hand out of to the trick or treaters. But times have changed (at least for this year) and I, per the boys request, started rehearsing my Halloween surprise face every time they practiced trick or treating at our door. 

This door specifically. Toward the third afternoon of Fall Break the boys started a verrrry loud game of puppies which involved lots of barking and pretending to pee on our one and only house plant.  So,of course the next best activity was to decorate the front porch. Hence the Miller Halloween celebrations got a pretty good dose of our Martha Stewart aspirations.  Our elderly neighbor said it was "jazzy" which is pretty much the weirdest halloween complement, but I will take it.

First grade is teaching Rhett a lot of stellar bits of knowledge, most good, some not my favorite. Example? He came home one day going on about the Pumpkin Elf, think similar to the Elf of the Shelf theme, and started putting a small pumpkin/gourd acquired from a field trip in the front door window sill. I think the idea was that the pumpkin Elf would come more the pumpkin as a trick. At first Rhett was the one moving the pumpkin and faking shock and disbelief at the shenanigans. But then the little pumpkin started spontaneously moving to very random places

- the bathroom garbage can
- the freezer
- inside the washer
- my sports bra basket

Rhett's genuine shock led to me briefly consider the legitimacy of the Pumpkin Elf...till I saw Beck trotting around the corner with the pumpkin and depositing it in the shower. Good job Beck. I might enlist him to help keep the smaller holiday characters going. I think he could do some great things with the Easter Bunny.  (For the record, Beck and I have kept this a secret betwixt us and the older boys are still fully convinced of the Pumpkin Elf's realness)

That owl is giving some serious side eye. 

And finally, the costumes that made the kid's final cut.

Rad was be thee raddest three year old ever, and live his months long dream of trick or treating as Rainbow Dash the My Little Pony. Rhett was be feeling "like a real man" as Wolverine and on of Beck's favorite grunts is "Arrrgh!" and who was I to stand in the way of his verbal accomplishments, so pirate it was. I always admire families who can pull of the family themes but #toomanystrongpersonalities for that to be the case for us.

"Now I know what it feels like to be a real man mom." - Rhett

The pirate hat lasted for 2 minutes but the sword proved to be a winner. Apologies to the house who's purple flowering bush got a nice beating for about 20 seconds. And the extra large Mastiff who got a whack on the backside as Beck rolled by in his stroller. 

Half of his costume was glorified spandex when I learned that girl's sizes run smaller than boy sizes. Opps.

"Wook at my tootie (cutie) mark!!!" - Rad (Barely pictured...the lightning rainbow bold on his hoodie.)

And a few final memories. 

- Following in my always responsible parent habits (big winks), I bought glow sticks to help keep my runners safe that night. Not my most responsible them to Beck and he chewed a hole in them, thus turning him from just your run of the mill pirate into a rave-going-pirate.

- A a solo pic of Radbow Dash...who chose to go comando under his hoodie - which we discovered half way through the night. Leaving one house, I heard the couple ask each other in not muted whispers if Rad was dressed as gay pride. I chuckled, but he's three guys. 

- As we trick or treated we ended up acquiring a few extra kiddos who herd around. Ok maybe not all these kids, but the addition of the three little friends made trick-or-treating...funner. 

Because parents 364 days a year: Don't take candy from strangers.

Parents on Halloween: Take candy from strangers. In the dark. And share with me.

Since it seems fair to say "I made you and you shall repay me with candy." Parental tax rights and all. Wink wink. ;) 

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